Day 31: The Main Event

Well, after 31 days of marriage, Brandon and I finally had our big reception, or what we have been calling our "main event." Today, at a beautiful park in Dixon, Illinois, we celebrated our marriage (yes, again) with about 130 family members and friends.

I wish I had a more eloquent way of saying this, but it was simply a wonderful time!I hardly know where to begin describing this huge success of a party...

The spread of food was just unbelievable. Brandon's uncle, Daryl, served as head chef; he had a team of about 10 people who put together huge plates of grilled chicken and pork chops, potato salad and apple sauce, and corn on the cob. There was a ridiculous amount of food, but from what I witnessed, most of the guests ate every last bite; and it was the to-die-for type of delicous!

When all that was over, we served the cake. The one thing I wanted to do traditionally was my wedding cake. It was simple, but it was beautiful; and it was exactly what I wanted.


But even more impressive than the cake was the sweet table that accompanied it. My new mother-in-law had been slaving away in her kitchen for months to put this together. I never officially counted, but she must have had 10 or 15 different things on the table. And every single one of them was a huge hit! I know she's reading, so let me just say...

THANKS, MOM!!!!!

Oh, but the party was so much more than the food. We had fun and games (volleyball, horseshoes, bags) for the adventurous souls who wanted to brave the heat and humidity. For those who chose to stay indoors, we had the pleasure of just sitting and talking. There were so many people there that I hadn't seen in years - college dorm-mates, high school best friends, and even the parents of the kids that babysat me when I was still single digits (oh, so long ago!). And, of course, every single family member I could think of (and some I didn't even know existed!!!!!).

After five hours of food, fun, family, and friends (oh, and a little bit of clean-up, too!), I am exhausted! But I'm also totally high on wedding!

This has been one long month of celebrations, and a part of me is relieved that the "main event" has come and gone (and without a hitch!); but the excitement is intoxicating, and it's hard to come down from the high.

Still, the whole point is that I am married!!! And we've got 11 more months to be newlyweds.

So keep reading...

Day 29: The Road Trip Continues

We went to bed at 10 last night, and we slept till nine this morning. We really, really needed it. We had about 600 miles and, perhaps, nine hours to go today; but we were in no rush. In fact, we had some plans in place...

Manchester, TN, where we stopped last night, is about 45 minutes from Lynchburg, the home of the Jack Daniel's Distillery. Being that it's pretty much on the way home, Brandon and I figured we might as well stop there and see what goes on there!

The tour took about an hour, and, although it seems kind of silly to say, we had a whole new appreciation for our favorite whiskey when the tour was over. Here's a fun fact for you: The Jack Daniel's distillery is in a dry county. You cannot buy alcohol there. However, several years ago, the distillery got a special law passed that allows it to sell souvenir bottles of their liquor. You still cannot, however, get a sample.

But, on the square in Lynchburg, you can sample fudge, ice cream, and any number of other items made from Jack Daniel's! (And that ice cream really does taste like whiskey!)

We enjoyed our snacks, but we truly did not need them, as we were on our way to Mrs. Mary BoBo's Boarding House Restaurant, another famous Lynchburg landmark. There, we enjoyed a family-style Southern meal of friend chicken, pork and gravy, corn muffins, macaroni and cheese, creamed corn, lima beans, fried okra, and fried apples. It was delicious, and it was filling! How we ever made it through the next few hours of our drive without falling into a food-induced sleep, I will never know.

But, about four hours later, we made it into Illinois. Our crossing-over point was Metropolis. Yes, THE Metropolis! As in home of Superman! There is a giant statue of the hero in the town square, and we absolutely had to stop and see it. There is also a Harrah's on the Ohio River there, and, well, we had to stop and see that too.

This little detour set us back about two hours, but we left Metropolis 100 dollars richer; so I suppose it was well worth it!

Brandon drove all day and into the night. He let me sleep almost all the way from Metropolis to Mendota - about five hours. Amazingly, when we pulled into his parents' drive-way, he was still wide awake. By then, it was 2:45 on Friday morning and technically Day 30 of our marriage.

It feels like we've made it an awfully long way this first month!

Day 28: The Road Trip Begins

Early this morning, Brandon and I began our first road trip as a married couple! We are making our way from Boca Raton to Mendota - from one home to another! It's 1369 miles from Point A to Point B, and our only hope is that we are still in love when all those miles are finally behind us! After all, we're heading to Illinois for the "Main Event" of our wedding festivities.

We did over half of our drive today. Brandon worked last night, and he woke me up when he got home just after four this morning. We made some coffee, packed the car, and hit the road. Twelve hours, 800 miles, and several adventures later, we arrived here in Manchester, Tennessee.

We're still in love at this point and about to go grab a beer and a bite. But first, I must tell you the adventures of the first day...

Everything went really well at first. Brandon drove the first leg and got us almost all the way out of Florida. That is one long state! I took over just before we hit Georgia, and Brandon took a little nap. He woke up about two hours later; we grabbed some snacks and drinks from our cooler, and we continued on our way - making good time and even enjoying the drive.

After a while, it started to rain; we were getting closer and closer to Atlanta, and traffic was getting heavier all the time. But we barely noticed; we were singing and laughing and playing the "What-Would-You-Do-With-20-Million-Dollars?" game, when, out of nowhere, we heard a CRACK! I just kept my eyes on the road, but I heard Brandon say, "That was a rock." I looked over at him, and he looked up at the windshield. In disbelief, I said, "Is that real?" "Yup," Brandon said, "and it's growing." The six-inch crack in the windshield was growing before our eyes. And I continued to say, "Is that real? Did that really just happen?"

Two hours, several stressful phone calls, and a stop at the Atlanta Airport Enterprise later, we had a new rental. (You will remember, of course, that our own car was damaged in the crash on our wedding day, so we have been driving a rental for several weeks.) We continued on our way, having to fight Atlanta's rush-hour traffic, due to our delay.

But we made it to our day one destination: Manchester, Tennessee! And, despite the lack of sleep, the crack in our windshield, and the high-stress conversation about whether we'd ever get a break with our vehicles, we are still in love!

So I'd say, overall, today was successful. We'll see how tomorrow goes!

DAY 20: Party Pick-Up

It is Tuesday morning, and I am exhausted. I spent most of last night cleaning up after our big wedding party on Saturday, which, although it did make a big mess, was quite a success!

Between two o'clock Saturday afternoon and two o'clock Sunday morning, we celebrated with over 30 people. Our next-door neighbor came over to help us grill, and together with these 30 friends, we ate ribs, chicken, meatballs, potato salad, spinach dip, chili cheese dip, and cupcakes. We did as much damage as we could to the two kegs our friends Lauren and Brian had provided for us. We even played Flippy-Cup for a while, and the girls' team won every single time!

The party was a good time, and that's all Brandon and I ever wanted. Weddings are wonderful, joyful occasions, but there's always been a part of me that feels it's a real drag to have to get dressed up, sit through a long ceremony, wait a couple hours to be fed, and then feel obligated to chicken dance. Of course, I'm happy to oblige for the people that I love, but I always wanted my celebration to be different, to be relaxed, to be fun.

And it was all of those things!

DAY 15: Two Weeks Already?

Today is our two-week anniversary, but it feels like mere minutes ago that we stood on that beach in front of our families, vowing to love and honor each other forever.

In these two weeks, we have really settled into this new world of marriage. Granted, our day-to-day lives are not all that different; but still, something is different. We still look at each other sometimes and say, "Hey, we got married!" as if the other had forgotten. And we continue to call each other "Husband" and "Wife" rather than "Brandon" and "Char" just to help us get used to saying those funny-sounding words.

One of the greatest feelings for me, as I celebrate this two-week mark, is that getting married is over now and being married has begun. Our wedding was everything we wanted it to be, and we were so fortunate to be able to spend an whole weekend with our families, basking in the summer sun and the just-married joy that surrounded us in Key West. But it was still a lot to plan, and it wasn't without its stresses. So I'm happy to have moved on from that place on my path where I was getting married.

It's not completely over yet, though. We still have two parties; and, again, we are so fortunate to have so much love in our lives that it is requiring us three events to really finish this business of getting married. But even while I continue to clean up after the last event and plan for the next one, I have an overwhelming sense of calm contentment. And all I can say is that, two weeks in, I love being married.

DAY 11: First Fight

This afternoon, Brandon and I had our first newlywed fight. I suppose this was bound to happen sooner or later. It was totally stupid and not about anything important but seemed to be the result of some pent-up stress. Fortunately, we got over it almost as quickly as we'd started it.

Brandon and I have always been good at communicating with each other. I think this must be the result of having spent five of our first six years together doing the long-distance thing. We learned how to really talk and - more importantly - really listen to each other, because so often, our conversations were all we had. But now that we live together, I think we sometimes take for granted the power of honest, straight-forward communication. Had we tapped into that power today, we could have avoided the whole misunderstanding.

That is not to say, however, that I shy away from fighting. I think fighting is a necessary part of any relationship. And I think that, if there's something that needs to be battled out, we should break out the weapons and go at it. Brandon hates this about me! He thinks fighting only makes us say things we don't mean and will eventually regret (which, I'll admit, is often true).

A few years ago, Brandon and I were planning a road trip up the east coast. We knew that our trip might prove stressful at times and therefore implemented a no-fighting policy for the duration of the vacation. The rules were simple:

1) Person A should find a way to communicate calmly and positively what his/her want, need, or feeling is.
2) Person B should find a way to respond calmly and positively to Person A's want, need, or feeling.

In this way, we went about our 12-day, 1500-mile road trip without one single argument. And it wasn't because we agreed on everything that happened along the way. It was because we made this very conscious effort to simply communicate. So, the morning Brandon got me a Sausage McMuffin instead of an Egg McMuffin (which I discovered only after we'd driven quite far from the McDonald's), I calmly said, "Brandon, when you have a chance, can you please turn the car around and take me back to McDonald's?" And, because I'd asked so nicely, he did. And I got my Egg McMuffin.

That day, I got what I wanted by communicating my needs, rather than shouting about them. Now that I think about it, maybe Brandon's right about fighting after all.

DAY 8: Reality Sets In

It is our one-week anniversary, and by now, we have come down from the high of our wedding weekend in Key West. On one hand, it's difficult to contemplate that this thing we have been planning and anticipating for so, so long has actually come and gone. But on the other hand, it's really wonderful to go back to normal life, without the stress of planning a wedding and preparing for house guests and - ugg - all of that pre-wedding primping!

I cannot deny that I relished being the center of the universe for that one brief moment in time, when I stood on the beach holding hands with my almost-husband. But I realize, as we settle back in to our routines, that the whole point of this marriage is that I am now - and will always be - the center of his world. And he is - and will always be - the center of mine.

That's a really nice feeling to come home to at the end of a long day at work, isn't it?

So, yes, reality has set in. There's laundry to do, dishes to wash, and insurance companies to be contacted, on top of jobs to done and paychecks to be made. But going about all of these oh-so-normal things thinking about the not-yet-normal fact that I am somebody's wife makes all of it seem rather special. So I'll do my husband's laundry, wash my husband's dishes, and deposit my husband's paycheck into our bank account. And then I'll sit with him on the couch, watching reruns of "The Office," and eating late-night snacks, thinking about nothing more than what an incredibly special day it's been.

DAY 4: Wedding Photos Part 2

Here are some much nicer photos of the wedding. Some were taken the next day, during our "redo," but you can't even tell! We all put the same outfits back on, the weather cooperated a second time, and Adam even got a second Mustang!
















So, as you can see, even with that crazy car accident (and the stress it caused), it was a really beautiful wedding!

DAY 2: Wedding Photos Part 1

This is my brother-in-law, Adam, in his very sleek Mustang. My sister was going to attach tin cans to the back, and they were going to drive off with us after the beach weddding.




But instead...

DAY 1: Fireworks!

Today, July 1, 2010, I got married. Brandon and I were high school sweethearts and have been together for nearly a decade now. But today was our big day!

It was to be a very special day indeed. But, for the past year, as we have been planning this wedding, I've been adamant about keeping our festivities about the entire marriage - you know, committing to each other for life - and not just about this one day. This day should be important, and this day should be huge, and this day should be really, really special. But the whole point of this day is that we're about to spend a whole future together; so, at the end of it, well, it's just another day that has come and gone. Except that you are married now; and that's forever, at least in my book.

All that said, our wedding today was beautiful. We had our immediate families - four parents, two brothers, one sister, one brother-in-law, and one sister-in-law - all here with us in Key West, which we have always considered our own personal Paradise. We got up early, before the sun was beating down too hard on our shoulders (after all, it is hot in Paradise in July), and headed out to Smathers Beach. We parallel parked three cars at three consecutive meters, went out onto the soft white sand, removed our shoes, gathered in a circle, said our vows, exchanged rings, kissed, and cried (well, that was just me, actually).

And then, about two minutes after my dad (the pastor) officially announced us as husband and wife, we heard a big bang! Like fireworks out in the road. Only, when we turned around, it wasn't fireworks at all, but a large work truck that had run itself into our three parked cars (plus one more that was in front of us) and flipped onto its side. Brandon, my husband and hero (sorry, but it is my wedding day and I am in a very sappy-romantic kind of mood, despite being in the middle of this ridiculous story), ran out into the road - bare feet and all - to make sure the driver of the big work truck was ok. He was; he climbed right out of the passenger-side window, with a few bumps and bruises and just a tiny bit of blood running down his arm.

The only damage was to our material things: My brother-in-law's rented Mustang convertible (also the bride and groom's getaway car) was absolutely totaled. It was kind of wound all around itself and looked a lot more like a big pile of scraped-up metal than any kind of wedding getaway vehicle. My mom's "little blue bullet" (a Ford Focus wagon), which she genuinely loved, was also totaled; the guys from the towing company actually had to tie the bumper to the roof of the car before dragging that blue bullet away. Our little Honda Fit (who has already been through so much in his three short years) was thrown about 100 feet forward, where he was promptly stopped by a fourth parked car (belonging to no one in our party).

The police showed up and rolled out their crime scene tape (ok, I admit that was kind of cool). Two hours later, we were back at the hotel, getting out of our wedding clothes in a hurry so we could get ourselves to the nearest bar. Which we did, and now we are almost to the point where we can laugh about all of this.

A lot of people - my family members, the police, and some random passersby - told me that I seemed to be taking it very well. One of the police officers even said, "I can't believe you're still smiling." And all I said at the time was, "Well, honestly, what else can I do? And hey, I still got married."

As I've thought about it this afternoon, I've really gone back to what I've been saying so adamantly all along - that it's not just about today, but about the entire future that Brandon and I are about to have together. I mean, life happens, car accidents happen, weddings happen, and then life just keeps moving forward. This very long, very stressful wedding day is going to be over after a few more hours pass. But Brandon and I said our vows, and we exchanged our rings, and we kissed in the sand and committed to each other for life.

Someday the car accident that happened at our wedding will be a distant memory. But we will still be married.

And that is the bottom line - I AM MARRIED!!!

For the next year, I'll be documenting my life as a newlywed (censored, of course). I'd love it if you would join me here for the journey. I'm sure it will be just full of fireworks!

Sincerely,

Charlotte K Eames